Friday, December 13, 2013

The Murdery Delicious Hamwich Gumm Mystery - A Fiendish Kettle of Fish

{As we proceed...}

A further look into clues from my "thrilling page-turner" as Joan Rivers called it, available now on and Just in time for the holidays!

A Recipe for a Fiendish Kettle of Fish
1 bottle white wine
A sad pile of leeks, onions and tomatoes that have been hacked apart
Mashed garlic
Basil, thyme, fennel, saffron, bay leaves or anything else that may have been stolen from an unwitting neighbor.
Several pounds of fish from a chum bucket that are not quite dead yet and still flopping about. Any kind; it hardly matters. Gut them and keep the bones.

Open the bottle of wine and drink it. If there is any left, add it to the base for your soup should you get around to it. Sauté onions, garlic, and leeks in some sort of oily resin and add tomatoes. Add the regrettable collection of fish heads, bodies and the like to your kettle and add water drawn from rusty pipes to cover. Bring to a barbarous boil. Cook it all down until any remorse has been left behind. Strain. Dress it up with moldy bread and roughly abused parsley. Or go out to dinner.

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